Ongoing routine

I haven’t been posting much this past week, even tho gradually feeling better. The daily routine of twice a day IV sessions, which take around 3 hours each and occasionally run an hour or two longer, plus miscellaneous appointments and efforts to eat a lot, haven’t left much time-energy for blogging. When I get back to 303, I end up napping most of the time till going back for 8 pm IV.

Nevertheless, there has been steady improvement with the infections, tho we don’t know when they’ll be completely cleared. The white blood cells started coming back yesterday, and today I’m officially no longer neutropenic. For these two reasons, life is easier.

Also, Jo Marie has been here in Rochester most of the six days of neutropenia. Having her around is joyful and comforting.

Questions remain: When will infections clear? When can we stop the IV antibiotics? When will the third cycle of chemo begin?

Blood work and a PET scan on Monday, then consultations on Tuesdays may answer some of these questions. Still, uncertainty hovers over everything, which is just the way things are — thusness (tathatä). Learning to live with it releases distress and increases ease of living.

May all your noble aspirations bear fruit.

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9 Responses to Ongoing routine

  1. Ellyn says:

    Good news about the neutropenia. Hope the infections clear soon.

    There is so much “thusness” in medical care. It’s good that you can accept that, or otherwise you and Jo will go nuts.

    Keep up all the ease of living!

  2. hidetada says:

    Yes, “living life on life’s own term” reduces a lot of dukkha… Glad to see this post. Always remembering and thinking of you. Hide (Armand, too. I talk to him often)

  3. charlie knower says:

    Good to see your posts again. Missed you. 🙂 Glad to hear news of Jo Marie also. I’m not sure if you know, but Patti and I leave for Tucson on Feb 22, returning in early April. Looking forward to lots of sunshine.
    May you be at ease,

  4. Tim says:

    Yes, living with this type of uncertainty is very difficult but it’s also becoming a valuable lesson for me.

    I know several loved ones going through rounds of chemo, surgery, tests, etc. It got to the point where I wanted to visit LP to feel grounded. So I emailed Jo in December and well… I think you can take the story from here.

    I’m now learning to live without always grasping for solid ground that doesn’t exist – reassurance that we will always be healthy. Thank you for reflecting on living with uncertainty. My best to you and Jo.

    Oak Park

  5. Aew says:

    I agree with you that having Jo around is joyful and comforting.I called Took 2 days ago and told her about your blog.I can only imagine how tired you would be at the end of each day after Tx session.Having contacts with fellow human being meant a lot to me when I was hospitalized for 2 weeks due to preterm labor in 2000.I wish i knew how to use e-mail and etc. then ( my trainer was in-utero yet at that time!).Bless your heart that you still try to write to all of us even when you were as tired as can be.
    Best regards to you and Jo.

  6. Kurt Rasmussen says:

    Glad you’re feeling better. For chrissake don’t let this blog put pressure on you. Do it when you will enjoy it only. Guess that sounds bossy… hey, we had the first meeting of our mindfulness group in SLC on Wednesday. Only one person I didn’t know showed up… but what a person! I’m totally coming to LP this summer. I hope you’re building something or have some hard work I can help you with. You know at that retreat my best time was probably washing the pots.

  7. Bil says:

    GO PACKERS! (no judgement:)

    PS. Glad that you are doing well and Jo can be there.

  8. Linda in Seattle says:

    Thanks for the update Santi.

  9. Rosana says:

    Hello White Blood Cells! tathäta

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